Answering akka's questions

 She asks me of why I listen to her,

Of why I worry about her,

Of why I love her when she doesn't make my day better and safe because of being away.

How do I tell her that

I love listening to her rants and lovely musings, as it is through her that I have learnt to both speak my many thoughts and quietly listen to flowers talking to each other.

How do I tell her that

I worry about her as I have sent a part of myself with her, and that any negative experience is my failure at protecting her.

How do I tell her that her being away

Doesn't mean she puts me out in the world without being of help?

How do I tell her that

She has, through her love, shaped my decisions and made me a strong woman of grit and peace.

And that her messengers: a deep breath, a book, a tree, a poem, a song and Gopi work with me for my safety and calm.

How do I tell her that

I was not taught to love her…

That I wasn't required to be told of her being my akka, and that the moment she'd touched my little hand, I'd felt the warmth and decided that she'd be my harbour and my sarvasvam?

How do I tell her that

Even if Ammi brought me into the world and it's Nanni who I’d decided to trouble, I was most excited to meet only her upon my arrival into this world?

How do I tell her that it was the moment I saw her smiling at me with pride and love that I had decided that I'll love her the most and that she'd be the only person I’d protect with all my life?

How do I tell her that 

In her happiness is my smile 

And that in her confidence, my strength?

Yours Lovingly

~ Bavishya

(Written on 12 April 2026)

(my abstracts)